MUBASHRAT K ADAAB (BIWI K LIYE)

ZAROORI SAMAN:

Baghaer baazu wali kursi, cushion wali sukht bister, sukht mattress, do takyay sukht mubashrat kay waqt kamar kay neechey rakhney kay liye, do narm soney kay liye, chiknaahat koi achi cold cream paani mein hul honey wali jelly, badaam, coconut ya zaetun ka oil, Vaseline aur petroleum jelly hargiz istimaal na karein. Yeh faraj mein ja kar jum jati hai jis sey infection ka khatra hota hai. Safaee kay teen kaprey hun ek mota aur bara neechey bichaney kay liye, baqi do mia'n biwi kay liye.

MUBASHRAT MAIN ZIADA LUTF ANDOZ HONAY K LIYE:

Behter hai kay mubashrat kay din pehley sey taey shuda ho ya mia'n biwi ek doosrey ko waze'h isharey dein kay jinsi amal ka program hoga , waisey to koi bhi din ho sakta hai magar islam mein juma'a (friday) kay din ghusal ki fazeelat hai yani mubashrat juma'araat (thursday) ki raat ya juma'a sey pehley afzal hai.
Hadees e nabvi hai kay jo koi juma'a kay din(apni biwi kay liye) ghusal ka saamaan karey aur khud ghusal karey, to us kay liye har qadam saal bhar kay amal ka badla hai goya saal bhar rozey sey raha aur unn ki raato'n mein qayam kya. (mishkat) Mubashrat kisi bhi waqt ki ja sakti hai din ho ya raat, taa'hum nabi kareem aksar raat kay pichley peher witr ki namaz ada karney kay baad mubashrat farmatey thay, iss waqt amooman fard zyada pur sukoon hota hai aur jald manzil nahin hota.
Jinsi amal kay liye baqa'eda tayyari ki jaey, khawand jald ghar aa jaey, biwi bhi jald kam khatam kar ley, bacho'n ko sula dey, mia'n biwi thakey huey na hun jismani aur zehni tor per pur sukoon hun khauf, pareshaani aur thakawat waghaera main mubashrat na ki jaey iss surat mein fard bharpoor lutf andoz nahin hota. Iss sham khana kam aur jald kha liya jaey, ghiza zood hazam ho yani mubashrat kay waqt paet bhara hua na ho.
Kamra aisa ho jahan sey aawazei'n doosrey kamro'n tak na pohonch sakein mubashrat kay doran fard jinsi haejaan mein aawazei'n nikalta hai, naey shaadi shuda couple mein iss ka khauf hota hai kay inn ki aawazei'n log na sun lein yeh khauf unn kay jazbaat ko sard kar deta hai iss surat mein halka phulka music lagaya ja sakta hai taa kay aawazei'n kamrey sey baher na jaein. Kamrey ka temperature munasib ho na garmi ho na sardi yani jagah pur sukoon ho, shor o ghul aur madaakhlat sey mehfooz, phone utaar dei'n warna phone ki ghanti aap kay jazbaat ko ek dum sard kar degi.
Donon mia'n biwi kay jism saaf suthrey aur har qism ki buu se paak hun, behter hai kay sham ko ghusal kar liya jaey, agar bathroom bedroom kay sath ho to mubashrat sey ek ghanta pehley donon ikaththey ek doosrey ko ghusal dein maqsad mael utaarna nahin bul kay ek doosrey kay lums sey lutf andooz hona hai, brush kar liya jaey taa kay muu'nh sey budbuu(smell) na aaey.
 Kamrey ka mahol (environment) romantic bana lein roshni madhdham ho agar rangeen ho to aur bhi acha hai, mom batti ki roshni mahol ko bohut saher angaez bana deti hai iss ki roshni mein aurat ka jism zyada khoobsurat dikhaee deta hai, air freshner ka istimal karein khushboo aap donon ki pasand ki ho.
Shaadi per itna khurch kartey hain to kuch khurch apney bister per zaroor karein bister kushaada ho yani double bed ho taa kay harkat mein aasani ho gaddey bohut zyada narm na hun zyada narm bister per jism ander ko dhuns jata hai jis ki wajah sey harkat karney mein dushwari hoti hai. Bister sey charcharahat ki aawazei'n nahin aani chahiyie'n bister ki chadarei'n khush rung, shokh aur nihayat mulaem hun masaln satin aur silk waghaera ki, cotton aur khurduri chaderei'n sara maza kharab kar deti hain. Mumkin ho to farash per qaleen ya moti dari bichi ho taa kay kabhi kabhar change kay liye neechey mubashrat ki ja sakey, khwab gaah mein ek adad bara aaena bhi ho taa kay wahan aap apna bana o singhaar check kar sakein.
Mard chu'n kay bunyadi tor per bazarya basaarat yani kisi cheez ko dekh kar jinsi tor per mushta'il hota hai le'haza aap ka libaas khush rung, mulaem aur silky ho libaas ki banawat aisi ho kay aap kay khoobsurat a'azaa'a maslan chaati waghaera zyada numaya'n aur pur kashish mehsoos hun. Libas ka rung khawand ki pasand ka ho iss tarah jun'hi khawand aap ko dekhey ga us kay jazbaat bharak uthei'n gey aur jab woh narm libaas kay ooper sey aap kay jism per haath phaerey ga to us kay jazbaat mein aag lag jaegi. Iss kay sath khawand ki pasand ki khushboo bhi istimaal karein siwaey galey kay locket kay baaqi zaewraat utaar dein.
 Khawand ki pasand kay mutabiq halka sa make up karein amooman mardo'n ko zyada make up pasand nahin hota iss silsiley main aap khawand sey pooh sakti hain kay usko kya acha lagta hai. Humarey haan ajeeb sitam zareefi hai kay shuru mein to biwiya'n inn cheezo'n ka khayal karti hain magar chund baras guzar janey kay ba'ad wo libaas aur jismaani safaee ka khayal nahin rakhtii'n, ghar mein aksar auqaat unn kay kaprey gandey hotey hain, haatho'n sey pyaz aur adrak ki buu aa rahi hoti hai, jism paseena ki buu sey labraez hota hai yah sab cheezein mard kay jinsi jazbaat ko sard karney kay liye kafi hoti hain. Aurat iss rawayye ki wajah sey apni kashish kho deti hai magar yehi aurtein jab bazaar jaeingi to naha dho kar ban sanwar kar jaeingi haala'n kay aurat ki shakal o surat, libaas aur jism ko humesha khawand kay liye pur kashish hona chahiyie. Iss kay liye aurat ko sha'oori koshish karni chahiyie hadees e nabvi ka mafhoom hai kay biwi ki zahiri shakal o surat aisi ho kay khawand dekhey to khush ho jaey libaas kay elawa biwi kay chehrey pe muskuraahat ho. 
Mubashrat sey pehley ek doosrey kay kaprey utaarna bhi ek lutf angaez marhala hai le'haza aurat ka izarbund aur bra kay hook iss qism kay hun jisey khawand aasani sey khol sakey warna ba'surat e deegar izarband aur bra ko utartey utartey uss kay jazbaat sard parjaeingey.
Mubashrat faraj (vagina) mein ho gi aurat ka khayal hota hai kay mard ko ilm hota hai kay zakar kab daakhil karna hai jab kay mard ko ilm nahin hota le'haza jab aurat kay jinsi jazbaat urooj per hun to woh mia'n ko daakhil karney ka ishara karey iss kay sath hi dakhool mein mia'n ko madad karey taa kay khawand ko dakhool mein diqqat na ho.
 Iss kay liye aurat penis (zakar) ko hath sey pakar kay vagina (faraj) mein daakhil kar sakti hai ya apney donon labias (lub) achi tarah khol dey taa kay khawand zakar ko aasani kay sath daakhil kar sakey humarey haan chu'n kay biwiyio'n ko iss baat ka ilm nahin le'haza woh dakhool mein khawand ki rehnumaee nahin kartiin jis ki wajah sey bohut sey khawand rehnumaee ki adum mojoodgee mein aasani sey dakhool nahin kar patey aur iss koshish mein baher hi manzil ho jatey hain yeh cheez biwi kay liye shadeed frustration aur khawand kay liye sharmindagi ka baa'iss hoti hai.
Mahireen ka khayal hai kay jab tak aap donon kay liye jinsi amal sey lutf andoz honey kay liye kafi waqt na ho iss ki koshish na ki jaey, iss kay liye aap kay pass kam az kam ek ghantey ka waqt ho tub aap foreplay (mohabbat kay khel) aur intercourse (mubashrat) sey bharpoor andaaz mein lutfandooz hosakein gi. Aurat ko to jinsi amal kay liye tayyar honey mein hi aadha ghanta lag jata hai.
Jaisey kay peechey bataya ja chuka hai kay mubashrat sirf faraj mein hogi maq'ad mein qata'an haram hai Hazrat Abu Huraera sey rivayat hai kay Hazrat Muhammad ney farmaya jo shakhs apni aurat ki maq'ad mein budfaeli karey woh mal'oon hai, khuda uski taraf nazr e rehmat sey nahin dekhta (tirmazi, abudaud). Budqismati sey humarey haan bhi ab kuch khawand yeh harkat kartey hain merey paas aisey kaee case aaey. Le'haza iss surat mein biwi ko kabhi bhi khawand ko iss amal ki ijazat nahin deni chahiyie warna woh khud bhi gunah gaar hogi agar kabhi ghalti sey ek aadh baar ho jaey to surf e nazar karein, ba'soorat e deegar pehley apney khawand ko samjhaei'n warna iss ma'amley ko donon khaandano'n kay samney paesh karei'n. Iss tarah islam mein haez o nifaas kay doran bhi mubashrat sey mana kya gaya hai chuna'ncha irshaad hai "Haez (menses) mein aurto'n sey bacho inn sey qurbat na karo jab tak woh paak na ho lein to jab paak ho jaein to inn kay paas iss jagah sey aao jis ka Allah ney tumko hukum diya hai."(al-baqarah 222) Intercourse during menses (haez/mahwaari mein mubashrat) na karney wali khawateen amooman rahem kay cancer sey mehfooz rehti hain.
Hazrat Aaesha farmati hain kay samajh daar aurat ko chahiyie kay ek alag kapra farigh rakhey jab uska shohar mubashrat sey faarigh ho jaey to isey usko thama dey apni safaee khud karey agar inn kay kapro'n mein janabat ka koi asar nahin pohoncha ho to woh inn kapro'n mein namaz parh saktey hain. (al-mufti)
Biwi apney khawand ko bataey kay Allah kay nabi ney fori tor per mubashrat sey mana farmaya hai kyun kay aurat ko jinsi tor per tayyar honay kay liye kuch waqt chahiyie. (zadulmea'ad) yani mubashrat foran shuru nahin kar deni chahiyie warna aap iss amal sey lutf andoz nahin hun gi.
Mubashrat sey pehley donon ye du'aa parh lein" Ya Allah humein shaetaan sey mehfooz rakh aur usko bhi (shaetaan sey mehfooz) rakh jo tu humein ata farmaey." (bukhari)
Ek mubashrat kay foran ba'ad agar doosri baar mubashrat karni ho to afzal yeh hai kay ghusl kar liya jaey ya phir wuzu kar liya jaey, tayummum bhi kya jasakta hai. Ya sirf a'aaza e makhsoosa (genitalia) ko dho liya jaey aur ghusl subah kar liya jaey lekin kuch khaney sey pehley wuzu karna sunnat hai.
Jun'hi khawand ka zakar biwi ki faraj mein daakhil ho jaey to donon per ghusl wajib ho jata hai chahey khawand manzil ho ya na ho.

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